Another Step in the Journey

Where to start?! The past few weeks have been crazy busy.... I ended up going on a teaching interview - for a job that I do not even remember applying too (but hey, I guess that is how things work out some time!). After an interview, a second round teaching demo, and a meeting with the school's president - I was asked to join the staff as a part-time Social Studies teacher. YAY!

I am super excited to teach Social Studies again- it has been forever since I have gotten to teach- what I actually went to school for; however, I am going to be teaching classes I have never taught before-so I plan to learn just as much as the students throughout the year.  I have been assigned a 12th grade Government/Economics course- which will be really fun- considering that it is an election year. I am excited to hear the viewpoints of students and have them engage in some debates on current events throughout the year. In addition, I am also teaching two half year 10th grade electives - the first is called the Lost Culture - which is all about Native American History - which is the one I need to do a lot of research on, not only have I never taught it, but I have never taken a full course on it either. But- I am excited to learn, and expand my knowledge of the many cultures that still exist within the United States today- as well as take a historical look at the various Native American cultures. The other elective, that I have been assigned, is called The Great War - which is focused on World War I - which I cannot wait to teach; however, I will have to wait until January to get started on that - as it is a half year course.

I know I was looking for a full time position- but I realized that I am very happy with a part time position- it still allows me plently of time to work at the learning center - and will also help me ease back into the classroom. It also gives me some time off mid-afternoon between jobs to take that adorable pup of mine on some afternoon walks.

What is the biggest challenge in starting on this new path? - I would say not heading to work in the morning in my yoga pants- but somehow I think I will manage.

Just a picture from the Aruba files - to remind myself
that it is still in fact summer- if only for a few more short days.

Just feeling a bit bummed

It is insane just how easily a mood can change from one day to the next, or even one hour to the next. Today started off great, but part way through the day I just started to feel bummed out. I know it my last post I mentioned that a job doesn't define who you are, but I really do hate that it is Augut and I have nothing lined up and official. It is just hard, I know that I am a great teacher, but the current state of education is not the best right  now; so I know the chances of any job are slim to none-but it is a harsh reality to face. I really am a believer that all happens for a reason and that everything always works out....it is just hard waiting and having to constantly remind myself that all of the above are in fact true. It is also difficult to be happy for the success of others, especially when I wok jut as hard, if not harder than they do. I am by no means saying I more deserving of any given position, but it always seems that someone is picked over me. I am sure there a reason for this, but it has not yet become clear to me.

In closing...here's to another day of pushing forward and trying my hardest not to let the negatives get the best of me; but, to also realizing that a good cry is sometimes is the best remedy (and the remedy is even better when followed by a good glass of wine). So, cheers to a good cry, a glass of wine, and moving forward to another day.

Rainbow on my way to work a few months back-beautiful symbol that in every storm there comes beauty 

 

August Already!

I cannot believe just how fast this summer has gone by....we are already a few days into August which seems absolutely crazy! Time has really been flying by, it feels like it should still be June...but sadly we have passed July 4th already, I have been on two vacations, the Toby Keith concert has come and gone, and I still do not have solid, concrete plans for a job in the fall. But, I will say that it has been a wonderful summer, and I have gotten to see a lot of my friends and family, although not as often as I would have liked. However, as always when I do see my friends we have an amazing time and I realize just how much everyone means to me.

I finally feel more relaxed about not having all of the answers to my career and future, I have still been job searching, but I have not let it take over each and every night like I was before. I have learned that I still have to live my life and that my job does not define who I am. On a good note I have been getting more hours at the learning center and actually worked 31 hours this past week. While I know this is not full time, or any where near the almost 60 hours I was working before, it has still kept me busy and helped me, again, to realize how much I love teaching one-on-one and hope that I can continue to work a good amount of hours in the fall. I may also have the opportunity to independently teach some workhops as well. I am also still weighing my options as well. I know that life will lead me on the path that I need to be. However, I am going to continue focusing on spending time with my husband, friends, and family; even though it I already August I feel like we have a lot of summer fun left. And, I am determined to make the most of it!

I have decided that I am going to take time each day to focus on myself and my personal goals, inlcuding spending more time with my Ruger, our black lab (we have gone on more walks lately), spending more time with Ian, less time watching tv (although reruns on How I Met Your Mother always pull me in, and the Olympics of course!), and focusing on my personal health and fitness goals-which I have really let slide lately. I did however make the decision to quit coaching for Beachbody, I realized I wanted to help myself and friends (if they ask), but I didn't want to be in a position that wanted me to sell products, I also did not want to focus only on those products when there is so much else out there.

I have high hopes for August and all that it has to bring, including some cookouts with friends, one of my best friend's bridal showers, and two very important birthdays- a first birthday for one of my best friend's daughters and my niece's fourth birthday! Until next time....make sure you take a moment or two each day and focus on something or someone that makes you smile.

Ruger-relaxing after a walk around the neighborhood 

Sun Tans and Balashi Beer



Sunset on our last night

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I'm back, From an amazing trip to Aruba with the husband, we were only gone six nights, but it was wonderful to get away and take some time to relax. Although, I am recharged and happy to be back (and ready to put my life back in order) I am so excited to write all about it! (and will probably take a few posts to go through everything I want to share). I've been home for about a week now but between work, unpacking and just life in general I haven't had much free time. But I am here now, and finally getting to this post!

First, we stayed at the all-inclusive Tamarijn resort in Aruba which also gives you access to the Divi all inclusive resort, which is just a short and beautiful five minute beach walk away. The resort is beautiful and who doesn't love all-inclusive?!? All you can eat and drink, it is fantastic! If you have never done all-inclusive I highly suggest it. It really helps you to relax knowing all you have to the entire trip is make a few dinner reservations. We did go off resort the night of our anniversary for dinner, but other than that we stayed put. We did a jeep tour of the island last year, so we decided that this year would be all about relaxing ( minus a quick walk to the grocery store to buy some balashi beer to bring home, but more on that later).

Back to the restaurants, drinks, and food everything was so good I swear I gained at least 10 pounds, but it was absolutely worth it! I drank more piña coladas than I care to admit and drank a fair share of wine with each dinner and of course balashi beer, which you can only get in Aruba! -they do not export it anywhere. However, we were able to bring back two six packs! We would have brought more- but custom only allows you so much! (guess we will just have to go back again!) My favorite restaurant at the resort is a tie between the Red Parrot and Paparazzi. Red Parrot has awesome coconut shrimp (which I ordered both times we went) and has outdoor seating and a beach view. We ate there on our first and last night, which was a perfect start and find to our trip. Paparazzi is the resort's Italian restaurant and my other favorite they have the best steak and spinach ravioli with a gorgonzola sauce.

Our first meal the afternoon we arrived- Balashi Beer, Pizza, and Mexican Fries!

The bars at the resort also have awesome pizzas, grilled sandwiches (as well as chicken fingers, French fries and that sort of thing). We tended to eat at the bars for lunch each day. My favorite there was a grilled sandwich with gouda cheese, ham, and pineapple, and pizza with jalapenos, pineapple, and ham. I guess since I mentioned dinner and lunch I should talk breakfast as well....we ate breakfast at the buffet each morning, which has everything and anything. Ian's favorite was the corn beef hash and I was a big fan of the French toast and made to order eggs and omelets. Oh, and I have to mention the coffee...easily the best coffee I have ever had. They have extremely clean water in Aruba which I think plays a large role in why their coffee (and baked goods are so good).

The Hubby and Ian stopping to take a beach
picture walking to dinner - notice the beard!

Aside from the food and drinks, I love the beach and spent plenty of time just laying out and reading on the beach. As always I put my chair in the sun each day, while Ian hung back in the shade under what I called our divi divi hut...not sure of the proper name, but all I know is it prevented Ian from getting sunburn, which meant he stayed happy our whole vacation! It was a much needed trip and well worth it!

It's been awhile....

So, I have done an awful job of posting over the past month. I feel like I have had a million things to do, yet nothing at the same time. I have been letting job searching take over my free time, and although it is good that I have been applying I need to get back to doing the things I enjoy. For example, I have only worked out a handful of times, which is not like me and I have yet to read a single book all summer...again something very abnormal for me. I have been feeling scattered and still without a schedule. I did work 20 hours last week, which is the most I have worked all summer, which was good; it made me feel like I had a purpose. I am a bit unhappy on the lack of job opportunities right now, but au continue to remind myself, it is not me, but the current state of the teaching profession. On a good note one of my best friends got married last week, and the wedding was nothing short of amazing. Not only was he wedding beautiful, but I realized just how wonderful my group of friends is. We all haven't done the best job hanging out lately, but when we do we have the absolute best time. It is nice to know that I have people in my life who do not judge me, and love me for who I am. I am going to try and spend less time alone job searching and more time meeting friends for lunch, hanging out, and just laughing. The month of July brings my one year wedding anniversary ( which I cannot believe is here already!), and includes two trips: one to Aruba with the hubby for our anniversary, and another to the Boston area to visit my friend and former co-worker, and I will also get to the chance to meet her fiancé, which is very exciting. I have decided, because of all the traveling, that I will allow myself to stay scattered during the month of July, but come August 1st I will have to refocus myself and really start making decisions on what path to take, as fall will be here before we know it. I will also try to write more, not only on this blog but hopefully on bigger and more personal projects as well.

Just a quick post...

Well - if anyone read my facebook status ( I can't believe I just used that phrase -yuck!) you will realize that I just wasted my afternoon on a crazy teaching application that was worthless- because the position was past the posting date. I do not understand schools- if you post a job and have a deadline then please take the posting down after the deadline- that only makes sense! Especially, if it is an English/Social Studies combination position - because I will apply for it - and get super excited and not realize until over an hour and a half later that it was not worth my time! Ugh!


Okay - it feels good to get that vent out- besides the current frustration over applying for a job that is not really there- things are going well. I feel more like myself as each day goes by. I am still not 100% sure what my plan is. For now, I am applying to jobs, still researching grad school options, and waiting to see if any additional hours or responsibilities become available to me at my current position. We may be getting more students for the fall - so I am hoping that maybe they ask me to teach more hours, but alas we shall see.


I am currently working on organizing my books and determining my summer reading list - so if anyone has any good books to recommend it would be most appreciated! I will start to focus my blog on some of the books as the summer progresses and I have some time (and motivation) to read. It is strange how the days are flying by already. I cannot believe that we are almost half way through June! One of my best friend is getting married in a week and a half and the hubby and I will be off to Aruba in less than month- which seems surreal. I am so excited to head back to Aruba and be technology free for almost an entire week!

I am going to do my best to contiune to enjoy each and every moment - however, today's mission is laundry! - so I off to sort, wash, dry, and fold....I hope everyone else enjoys their afternoon, it looks like the sun is back out - at least in Pittsburgh! :)



I will do my best to post on a more regular (daily) basis - now that I feel more settled into my schedule, (or lack there of....)

-Nicole

Schedule...What Schedule?!?

So, as you all know my online teaching job ended on Monday. I have to say it has been a relief not to have work waiting for me 24/7, but I am not used to it at all. For the past three years I have held two jobs and worked on average between 50 and 60 hours per week, this week I am scheduled for about 20. I have learned that I don't work well without a schedule, I have slept in, gone out to eat (a few times), babysat my friend's daughter, fit in a few workouts, and even laid out for a few hours today; I know it all sounds great, but the lack of a schedule and not having 8am-8pm fully booked, is leaving me feeling quite unaccomplished. I know that a break is well deserved and sleeping in until 9am, is not the end of the world, it is just different. My current work schedule is also not consistent, some days I start at 10am, some days it is 5pm, other times I work a few hours in the morning and then a few later in the afternoon. It is all new and throwing me way off. I alo feel like I have no excuse not to have the house cleaned, organized, and all the laundry put away (none of which is done, by the way).

My husband told me I was being too hard on myself, which is most likely true. My online job has truly been 24/7 the past three years. There was always a paper to grade, an email to send, or a phone call to be made-or more times than not multiple papers, emails, and phone calls. It will be nice to start projects that can be finished, and that i can control, but I am just not there yet. I plan to spend some time picking out some new books to read, new writing projects to start, and I am still researching some graduate school programs to determine whether or not I will go back to school, and for what. I have to remember that each day brings new opportunity and that a less packed, more sporadic schedule, might actually be good for me, and remind me to live in the moment. Although, it has made planning a huge headache, I know that will subside soon, or at least I hope.

I know that I will get back on a schedule that works or me, I am not sure what that schedule will look like, or if it will be consistent from day to day (my guess is no), but I do know it will include more walks with Ruger(our black lab), more time with family/friends, and more reading time...and I do not mean 11th grade essays...I mean actual books! It will be quite a change, but I will make it work, I always find a way! :)

Chapter Closed ....

-Niagara Falls, Canada - picture I took on one of the many trips Ian and I have taken there



Today is a bitter sweet day for me- today was my last day working for the online high school that I have worked at for the past three years. This job has allowed to grow both professionally and personally. Professionally, it was my first full time teaching position as an English teacher, and I was able to learn not only more about teaching writing, but also strategies to teach and communicate with a very diverse population of students - through mostly virtually contact. Professionally, I know that I was able to make a huge different in the lives of many students- many of which made sure to send me final messages of kind words today -letting me know just how much I helped them, and how I never allowed them to fail. I'm starting to tear up just thinking about the difference that I made for so many of them.

Second, only to helping/seeing student success are the personal gains that came from this job. Not only did I  personally learn how to better budget my time and learn that, in addition to History, teaching English is truly a passion of mine, and something that I am good at - I have made some of the most amazing friends. - And, from now on that is what I will refer to them as, not former co-workers, but friends. Each one of them has shown love and support in many different ways over the past three years, and especially in the last month. I know I have told some of you - but for those of you who have not heard it directly- your kind words and support have made all of the difference for me, so thank you again for being there. From mentoring me through my first year of teaching to hanging out at the Columbia airport during flight delays - and everything in between, you all have been there.

It is amazing just how close you can become with individuals even if you only see them three or four times a year. I became friends with many of them before I even met them, each one of them has a unique personality - and without this job none of our paths would have crossed, nor would we be as close as we are. I believe teaching at a virtual school has really pushed as all together- since actual contact with students is limited- we heavily relied on one another to get through the day - through facebook music video links, silly e-mails, and of course the occasional (or not so occasional) phone call to vent. I'm starting to tear up again thinking of the memories. I know that I will stay close with and in contact with those who have made the biggest impact on me - because again they are not just co-workers, but they are my friends who I love and respect, not just because they are amazing teachers, but because they are amazing individuals.

I know that in my emotional state that I may start to ramble (or begin discussing inside jokes that are mostly likely not appropriate, or won't make any sense to the general population anyhow)- so I will simply end with - thank you for making this chapter of my life amazing, wonderful, and a darn good time.

Crossroads

-Picture I took of downtown Pittsburgh a few summers ago from my friend's boat

I feel as though my life is at a complete crossroads. As many of you know my current job will be ending this coming Monday, and I am not sure what direction I am going to go in. I have gone on a few interviews, but the teaching market in Pittsburgh is fierce and English/Social Studies jobs are few and far between. I will continue to tutor throughout the summer and as I wait to see what comes along. I have debated whether or not go to go back to school for a Master's Degree, something I have wanted to do for a while now; but the question is what for? Do I go for a Master's in Humanities, English, History, Education, Writing, Curriculum, or attempt a whole new career path. The possibilities and choices are truly endless.

I know writing is a passion of mine (this blog has helped me to remember that), but I am not sure if I could develop a career from it. Education has always been a passion of mine as well- which is why I got into teaching in the first place. I enjoy learning and sharing the joy of learning with others- so I do not think I am ready to give up teaching completely, but it would be nice if a full time teaching job would come my way. I know over the next few months I will have many decisions to make regarding my future, some in my control and some out of my control. I know that I am talented and capable and I know that I will do great things, the question is just what path will lead me there?

Thankful

 

-Sunset over the beach in Aruba last July on our Honeymoon

Days can get hectic, work becomes a priority, dishes need done, laundry needs folded, and the list continues... Sometimes we forget to stop for a moment and realize all that we have around us. Instead of thinking to the past and trying to figure out what we could have done better, I have realized that we need to move forward and focus on what we can do to make our futures better. It is okay to think back on the past (I have done so recently), and also focus on how to make the future better, but the challenge is to take a few moments each and every day to really put yourself in the present. What are you thankful for right now?

I am thankful for all those in my life who pull me up, when I am down. Who answer the phone regardless what time of day, or night it is. Those friends and family who can put a smile on my face just by showing up. I am thankful for the amazing time I can have with my friends, even when we are sitting around and not doing a thing. I thankful for each and every one of them. I have realized again, and again, what amazing, wonderful, loving, caring friends I have. I am truly blessed to have them in my life.

I am thankful for the children in my life, not my children (as I do have any), but my niece and one of my best friend's daughters- they are are two amazing little girls. One is only nine months old, and the other will be four this coming August. It is impossible to have a bad day when either one of them are around. I thankful to have the opportunity to watch them both laugh, smile, and grow. I also love to spoil them both. I have found it impossible to pass up the baby section while in Target, and find myself constantly telling stories about my four year old niece. I am also thankful for my goddaughter who will turn eleven this year. She is full of positive energy and again you cannot help but smile as soon as she walks into a room. Her and I have special roles in the family, as she is the youngest grandchild and I am the oldest.

I am thankful to wake up each morning to the sound of a barking dog (who is convinced that he owns the street outside of our window), and I thankful to have some place to live and amazing person to live with. I am thankful that almost all of my family is within 20 minutes, and that I can walk down the street to my mother's house at any given moment. I thankful that the sun shines each day, and that I am lucky enough to be alive and able to see it.

I thankful for my past because without I would not be here today, I would not know the people I know, or have the amazing memories that I do. I am thankful for the present and the memories that are being made each and every day. I know that the future holds great things for myself and for all those around me.

I challenge everyone to take a moment or two today and think about what you are thankful for; even though things may not always go as planned - I bet your list of reasons to get out of bed each and every morning vastly outweighs anything negative that has come or may come your way.

Memorial Day

"And I won't forget the men who died who gave that right to me,  And I gladly stand up next to you and defend her still today, Cause there ain't no doubt I love this land God Bless the U.S.A."

- Lee Greenwood, Proud to be an American

As the Friday workday is coming to a close, many of us are preparing for a three day weekend. Cookouts are planned (or being planned for last minute planners, like myself!), hamburgers and hot dogs are bought, the coolers are packed with ice and beer, and everyone is getting ready to really kick off the summer. I know I am looking forward to 90 degree weather, sunshine, and some MUCH needed time off work;  However, I want to make sure everyone stops for a moment and really thinks about what Memorial Day stands for.

Memorial Day isn't about the picnics, or having a Monday off work (although that is a bonus). It is about remembering those who have served and lost their lives defending our country. I also believe it is a day to give thanks to those who continue to serve in our armed forces as well. It is because of those who have risked their lives, left their families that we have a country with more freedoms than one can count, or exercise the right to use in a lifetime. It is only right and honorable to take a moment to remember those fine men and woman who have lost their lives fighting for our freedom. It is a time to support those families who have lost their loved ones, or are anxiously awaiting the homecoming of their active duty family members and friends.

I ask that between the drinking, eating, and great fun, that you make sure to take a moment of silence to reflect on the lives lost, and an additional moment to thank those who are still with us, who have served or are serving. They have all done a great service to this country, and without them who knows where this great country would be.

A special thank you to those close to me who have served in the past, and those who continue to serve in the present. Thank you does not seem nearly enough for what you have done.

To all those not at home: Come home safe, we are waiting for you.

Replacement

Ted: Oh, my God, Van Helsing is on. Remember when we went to see it? We sat in the back row.
Robin: I've never seen Van Helsing.
Ted: That's right. I saw it with... my sister.

-How I Met your Mother -Season 2

After yesterday's post about memories and after watching an episode of How I Met Your Mother last night I got to thinking about memories and how often we alter them....

Ever make that mistake talking to your significant other, only to realize half way through that it actually wasn't them? My lovely husband has an awful habit of doing this to me and then I have to prove to him that there is no way that I could have actually been in the story he is telling. I used to get jealous, like he was thinking of someone else or wanting them to be there, but I realize that he isn't. (I also realize that I do the same thing all the time as well!) We tend to replace people in the past with people in our present because we want to be with who we are currently involved with; we want to think that all our wonderful memories of traveling, seeing movies, or just generally being happy are linked to why we are happy today.

It isn't that we want to forget the past, or that we are trying to replace anyone- it is simply human nature to think in the present and to link our present to our past. We alter memories to fit our current situation. It isn't something that we do on purpose, and it isn't something that we should be ashamed about it. Unlike Ted from How I Met Your Mother  - we shouldn't have to make up some bogus line about it being our sister, brother, mother, or any other family member. We should instead go with "whoops?! That wasn't you!? I wish that it was! Maybe we should go/watch __________ (insert travel plans or lame 90s movie here).

Understand that our memory lies to us on a regular basis, and it happens to everyone, so don't worry about it. If you are on the listening end of the memory (and know 100% that the story is not about it) sometimes it is better just to pretend that it was in fact you. Sometimes when you start agreeing the person will realize it was in fact NOT you - and then you can both have a good laugh about the whole situation.

So, with that being said, instead of focusing on the past and who was where, and who did what, go out and make a new memory today. And, if you are really that bad with your memory - take a picture, then there will be no doubt who it was with.

Enjoy your day everyone, go make the most of it!

Memories and Mistakes

"Funny how a melody sounds like a memory, like a soundtrack to a July Saturday night. Springsteen."

 -Eric Church

I have realized as the years go on, we tend to change past memories to what we wished that they were. The bad times don't seem so bad, the good times seem even better. We forget those people who didn't make an impact on us, we downplay feelings, we view ourselves as more positive than we were. But, be honest with yourself just for a moment here. Were you are nice as you thought you were? Did you actually make mistakes, but now think that they were no big deal? I know I did. As humans we do not like viewing our flaws, so we don't. We act as if we didn't impact others on a negative level. As much as I wish I could look back and say I left a positive lasting impression on everyone I met, I know that just isn't the case. I made dumb mistakes, hurt feelings, and never said sorry.

I know today I am in a better place than I was five years (or even one year ago). I know I am nicer, I respect the feelings of others more; but I was not always that way. I was in my early 20s and thought I could do whatever I wanted, say whatever I wanted, and that everyone would still be standing there at the end. I took advantage of the kindness of others, not on purpose, I just didn't realize I was doing it. I thought I could cause a path of destruction, and still put it back together just as I wanted at the end. This is not the case. I know many who stuck it out and are still beside me today. I know I lost others along the way. I know that in life everything happens for a reason, even if the reason does not come out until years later.

For those of you in your early 20s remember you are defining your life, and who are you are. Remember to be kind, respect others, and know that you are impacting someone every day. I know some days you have no idea what you want in any aspect of your life. That is normal, you can be confused, but do not let that confusion turn to hurt for those around you. 

For those of you in your mid/late 20s - think back to your early 20s, you are not the same person you were there. You now are much more wise. You understand the feelings of others. You realize that actions have consequences and that no matter how strong, a drink is it will not solve any problems. Instead of hiding problems, feelings, or creating addition problems; just say sorry and focus on making yourself the best person that you can. No matter how hard you try, you cannot change those around you, you cannot change the past, you can only change yourself and create a better future.

For all the mistakes that have been made, for all the immature and rash decisions that I never admitted to, and for being an idiot when I knew better. I am sorry. For all the feelings I have hurt, and people I have taken for granted, you deserve an honest and true apology. I am sorry. For where it has gotten me to today, I am thankful.

When I was your age...

I was going through old documents on my computer the other day and stumbled on some writing a did about two years ago. I was attempting to put together some ideas for a book (it never got past page 5) with some rants about society. I don't know if it is actually funny at all, but I figured I would share. Below is just a small part of what I found - hope you enjoy!

(note I did not make any changes to what I found - so excuse any poor grammar/sentence structure that you may find.)

".....Here's an example for you, and a true story example (might I add): A girl gets in trouble in her biology class for cheating on a test. How did she cheat you might ask?...notes snuck under the table, maybe written on the desk, or maybe she was looking at notes on her hand- that has got to be it! (students love writing all over thier hands, arms, and even legs)-but sadly you are all wrong on all of those guesses. She was in fact using her cell phone. Oh, okay, so she had answers written in her phone's note pad- smart girl. Wrong again. Her mother was texting her answers, HER MOTHER?! Realy?! Come on mom get a grip, it is just a 10th grade Science test, and I am sure you don't know the answers either, unless you are sitting at home with an extra copy of the textbook because Sally Lou doesn't want to have a heavy backpack and gets extra copies of all her books. Okay totally beside the point, there are so many things wrong with this story-for one my mom would never have bothered to even text me back in a situation such as this. Come to think of it I don't think our first cell phone even had texting. And, that's right I said our phone-meaning my mother, father and myself all shared one cell phone (gasp!) I know so unheard of now -since 2nd graders are getting own phones now in days- again please get a grip people. Your child is in school for about 6ish hours a day, they do not need a phone! There are pay phones and school office phones for student use if they miss the bus or you forget to pick them up. Honestly all this cell phone business is just nuts. There are days I want to take my phone turn it off and throw it in a dark hole. However-then e-mails, texts, calls and of course facebook would not be within my reach. What a damn shame. Alright so what was my point? Ah yes- do not text your child during class and help them cheat on a test! It is just high school, it will be okay if you don't get a perfect, you will still go to college, and be sucessful- I promise! The moral of this -when I was your age mom didn't let me take a cell phone to school, and mom didn't do my homework/take tests/help me cheat...although dad might have helped me once...okay total joke, you get my point though, or maybe you don't - the point is if your kid doesn't put in the work let them fail, learn, and then pick themselves back up. They will survive I promise."

10 months and counting

"What do you like better Christmas or Wedding Season?" -Wedding Crashers

It's hard to believe that Ian and I have been married for over 10 months now. This time last year, I was running all around with last minute planning, dress fittings, meetings, place cards, and the list goes on. It seems like a different life, yet it seems like yesterday as well. I was just looking through our wedding pictures and if I could attend ours again I would in a heartbeat (notice I said attend not plan). Attending a wedding whether it be yours or one that you are attending is always a fun time- who doesn't love dressing up and dancing the night away!? However, the planning is another story- thinking back there was always something that needed done, someone that needed called, or some decision to be made. Don't get me wrong some aspects of the planning were fun - picking bridesmaid dressing, picking out a dress, flowers, cake tasting! But- the final two months were the most stressful, just hoping and praying that everything will fit together perfectly. For those of you in the final planning stages for your wedding, whether you have a few months left, or a few days left I promise it will all be worth it. Take a day off from the planning and remember the true meaning of the big day. When it comes down to it, it isn't about the flowers, dinner selections, invitations, or even the dress, it is about you and your furture husband (or wife); it is about making memories with family and friends that will last the rest of your life. It is a celebration!

July 9, 2011- a picture taken on our wedding day down on the North Shore- Pittsburgh, PA (Photographer- Craig Photography)

With all of that being said - the number one question that I still get asked is: "How's married life?" - well it is the same as life before marriage. I just have wedding pictures, memories, and a beautiful ring to show for it. It is humorous because you would not ask a couple that has been married for 30 years, "how's married life?" - but for some reason everyone finds it perfectly acceptable to ask younger couples. I wish I had some big insightful answer- but I do not. Married life includes everything that pre-married life did. The same people, the same house, the same animals (two cats who get into everything and a black lab who barks at everything), and the same daily duties (work, cooking, cleaning, you know the usual). If someone has found a good answer to this question, please share!- because I would love to have a fantastic answer to this; or I may start asking the question right back at the person asking (given they are married) - and see how difficult it is for them to find an answer, or see if they know something I don't about "how married life is!"

It is amazing to think that we are coming up on our one year anniversary though. I will be honest we have already eaten the top of our wedding cake (we just couldn't wait, and honestly wanted the space back in the freezer!) -  We also won't actually be home for our one year- we are treating ourselves to a second Aruba trip- the same place we went on our honeymoon, almost one year ago! I am looking forward to just spending time with Ian on the beach and relaxing (something neither of us do very well, or rather do not usually have the time to do).  

I just have to say that I love being married and could not have picked a better person to share to my life with - to Ian - I love you - and I am proud of the wedding we planned and the fun that was had by all. I wouldn't change a thing, except maybe change the weather to about 10 degrees cooler- but a little sun and sweat never hurt anyone! =)  Happy 10 months - a few days late.

What are you drinking?

"The healthiest meal of the day"

I decided to go with a fitness/health related post today - since I have not done so in a while, and I have had a lot of people question me lately about these "shakes" that I drink. The most common question recently is:  "What is that shake thing you keep posting on facebook about?"

Well today is your lucky day because I am going to give you more information about this "shake thing" that I have been drinking. First, it is called Shakeology and has been one of the best health decisions I have ever made. To me shakeology is an amazing breakfast (or lunch, or sometimes dinner), it is healthy and tastes great. Shakelogy comes in three flavors -greenberry, tropical strawberry and my favorite chocolate. I love mixing almond milk and peanut butter into my shakes, and sometimes I even mix in some coffee. I forget that it is healthy for me, for the simple fact that it tastes like a chocolate peanut butter milkshake!

Anyone who knows me, knows that I have a tendency to drink way too much coffee, but shakelogy has helped me changed that - there are days that I actually go without coffee now, or limit my intake to a cup or two, as compared to the whole pot I was drinking a few months back. For example, I had about half a cup of coffee mixed in with my shake this morning, and have not had any other source of caffeine today, but I still feel energized, alert, and focused. Shakeology has helped me lose weight (almost 20 pounds since January), stay on track with my eating habits, gain energy, and gives me no excuse not to eat breakfast - because it is quick and I can drink it as I start my day. (I had a bad habit of skipping breakfast, or thinking that four or five cups of coffee was an acceptable breakfast).

I can't explain everything there is to explain about shakeology - but I did find this great video that will help you determined if shakeology is right for you and your goals. Check out the video - and as always, let me know if you have any questions!

http://beachbodycoach.com/esuite/home/NicoleTanner?bctid=73854917001

Kind Words- to a teacher

"A good teacher is who teaches the students HOW to think, not WHAT to think."

Above is one of my all time favorite teaching/education quotes that I truly believe in. I absolutely love teaching and believe that is my true calling in life. My current position, that I will be ending this coming June, is an online position- which is very VERY different from an in-classroom position has been an extremely educational and rewarding experience. Sometimes when I do not feel as though I am making an impact or a difference- my students remind me that I am. I received the following e-mail today from a student:

"Mrs. Tanner, Thank you so much :) ; Your encouraging words definitely helped this school year :) I enjoyed you as a teacher and keep teaching because you are doing great. Hope you have a wonderful summer"

It truly is the best feeling when you realize what you were meant to do and that you are making a difference on a consistent basis. It doesn't matter what others think, what matters is what the students think, remember, and what impact you make on them. To all my fellow teachers- remember what drove you to this profession - it wasn't the money, or the status in society - it was the students and making a positive impact on the next generation that will run this country. Focus on what your students think of you, not what everyone else thinks of you.

Positive Thought through Amazing People

"Life isn't about weathering the storm, it's about learning to dance in the rain..."

I was determined to blog each night this week...but it obviously did not happen, for reasons that will be discussed at a later date....but I am going to do my best to pick it up from now on! So, on to tonight's blog! The power of positive thought and amazing people. Over the past few days the idea of positive thought has taken on a huge meaning, we all know that when it rains it pours, and often times we have no umbrella, but I have learned that positive thought, as well as those around you, can make any situation seem better. Am I saying to hide all emotions, and never cry, yell, scream, or just emotionally breakdown for a few minutes? Absolutely not! I am just saying after the breakdown happens pick yourself up and move forward! There is no use holding anger inside or thinking negatively about the future. I am a big believer in thinking positively and sticking to the fact that everything, does in fact, happen for a reason.

I had the absolute best, most motivating comment last night. I was at the learning center and one of my co-workers told me that I was beaming positive energy, or something similar, I dont remember the exact wording. This made me extremely happy, knowing that even though I have had an awful week that I have still be able to think positively and impact those around me in a positive, not negative way. On the subject of co-workers, I love mine, from both of my jobs, and I have to take the time to mention them. I do not know where I would be without them. My co-workers are amazing, talented, and extremely caring individuals...every single one of them. A few of them I even call my friends over calling them my co-workers, they know who they are and they are truly inspirational and fantastic individuals. You know you have great people in your life when something negative happens..and you don't even have time to be upset because everyone is already upset for you and taking some of the burden off your shoulders. It is a wonderful moment when you realize you have the support of not just one, but many who love and care for you, and remind you just how fantastic and wonderful you are. So, to all my co-workers, friends, husband, and family...thank you, it is because of you that I can pick myself up and be as positive as can be.

...not only should we all learn to dance in the rain, but we should "dance like no one is watching"

Looking back...breaking point

I was reading a friend's blog today about her weight loss journey and it made me think "what was my breaking point?" When did I realize that I truly needed to change, and once I started thinking back, my wedding comes to mind. July 9th 2011 was nothing short of everything I expected it to be, I was surrounded by my amazing friends and married my best friend. The one thing I didn't expect was all of the questions and comments while walking around to all the tables. "How did IAN lose all that weight?" and "Wow! Look at IAN!! How much weight did he lose?" I kept smiling the whole time, but inside it really knocked me down, between the stress of my job, planning the wedding, and Ian going through academy I was not able to drop nearly as much weight as I wanted for the wedding, now Ian on the other hand had, due to mandatory workouts during academy. It hit me then and then looking at our Aruba pictures from our honeymoon, that I did not like how I looked and the, then two years, of working from home as online teacher had really added on the pounds. I now realize that I basically used every excuse in the book for my weight, and lack of motivation to do something about it.

I didn't start working out or even eating better right away, I would run here and there on our treadmill, but kept eating out multiple times a week and not caring how bad anything was. I began to notice a lot of people around me losing weight and I realized I wanted to be one of those people too, not to mention I am in two weddings this year. In addition, we planned a return trip to Aruba and I realized that I wanted to look awesome in my bathing suit and not have the "everyone is staring at me because I look fat and gross" feeling as I walk down the beach or stroll through the resort.

I finally got my butt in gear when I joined a weight loss challenge group. I found it through a friend from high school who had lost a ton of weight, as mentioned in a prior post. I began drinking shakeology for breakfast (and still do), eating clean (at least most of the time), and actually sticking to my workouts, who are we kidding I actually STARTED to work out. I have by no means been perfect, I still cheat and go out for Mexican and a margarita, but I'm okay with that. I also miss workouts, but instead of giving up like I used to in the past, I just jump back on the next day. It is an empowering feeling to gain a lot of my self confidence back! Not a lot of people besides family have noticed a difference so far, and I realized I'm okay with that. I know the changes are happening. My jeans that were tight in January are now too big. I fit into dress pants that I haven't worn for at least 3 years. I was able to buy a size 10 Rerock jeans at Express and they fit comfortably. And,I just ordered a new bathing suit and am actually looking forward to putting it on. I still have a long journey to go, I'm not sure how long, as I haven't decided my goal weight yet...but right now I'm working towards 155 by May 1st, once I accomplish that I will set my new goal.

Hearing everyone comment about Ian's weight loss was really hard and initially brought me down and frustrated me, but now it just fuels my fire to continue to lose weight and become the best possible version of myself that I can be. And, no it is not all about weight loss, but instead it is about looking and feeling my best....and a reason to buy new clothes (in smaller sizes) is just an added bonus!

New Year's Resolutions Revisited

It has only been a little over 4 months since 2012 started, and by this time many of us have forgotten about the resolutions we made back in January; so I wanted to take some time to revisit those that I made.

2012 will be the year that I do not visit a tanning bed. I have actually stuck to this resolution 100%. My thought behind this was the harmful effects of tanning beds, and also a way to save some extra money. The closer we get to summer days the harder this resolution will be to keep, I hate being pale, but I will try to resist and hopefully have the chance to get a real tan by actually making the time to go outside, weather permitting.

2012 will be the year I lose at least 30 pounds. Well I am not even close to the 30 pound mark, but I have taken giant leaps towards this resolution. I have started drinking shakeology for breakfast, eating clean (most of the time), and working out on a regular basis. I am determined to stick to this resolution, and so far so good! Still about 20 pounds to go, but I will accomplish this!

2012 will be the year I give up fast food. I didn't eat a lot of fast food to begin with, but the random Wendy's spicy chicken sandwich and fries wasn't doing me any good either. I am happy to say I have stuck to this one 100%, I did not even have one of my niece's fries when we took her to MacDonald's on the way to preschool. This resolution has actually been the eaisest to follow.

2012 will be the year I pay off my credit cards. This is a huge resolution, and I have been making excellent progress. I know almost everyone has a little bit of credit card debt, but I was just sick of mine, so pay it off I will!

2012 will be the year Ian and I buy a house. This is huge, and we have been unsuccessful in our search so far, but we continue to look, search for houses and plan for it. We are determined and will not settle until we find our house.

As you can see I've done surprisingly well on my resolutions, this is because they are clear and measurable. They were written down and I try to revisit them ever so often. Are you on track with your resolutions? If not, ask yourself why, try to refocus or rewrite them, because that is the great part about your personal goals you can refocus them at any point. As you change and grow your goals should change and grow as well. When you accomplish one goal, create another one and keep pushing forward!

Going Local

I love trying new restaurants and going out to eat, it can be such a nice change of pace from cooking at home, or eating dinner with a barking dog right next to me. I especially love local businesses and my husband and I try to avoid chain restaurants as much as possible. This post is a shout out to my current favorites, and a big thank you for making delicious food, my husband and I will continue to support your businesses every chance we get.

Bartram House Bakery- Don't let the name bakery fool you, this place has everything; homemade soups, breakfast sandwiches, pepperoni rolls, salads, crepes, and everything in between and beyond. My personal favorite (at least until my next visit) is their breakfast sandwich - you get to choose your bread, type of egg(I went with egg whites), cheese, meat, and as many fresh veggies as you want to put on it. The best part?-the bread is soft and not covered in any butter-it was a healthy choice and delicious. One point of advice though-make sure you are either super hungry, have someone to share it with, or plan to take half home because the size of this sandwich is no joke.

I do have to mention the bakery items(it is a bakery after all) the pain au chocolate is my favorite, second to only the red velvet cupcake, it is flaky and has just the right amount of semi sweet chocolate pressed in the middle-so good!

Franklin Inn-in the mood for Mexican and near Rochchester Road? Then you will want to go here, the Franklin Inn wins without a question as my favorite local Mexican place. The salsa and guacamole are great to start and my favorite dish is the chicken mole enchiladas. The chicken is moist and the mole sauce is thick and just to die for. They also have an awesome black bean and corn salad as a side- which I highly recommend, I do not even like corn and I love this salad; it is served cold and has a great tangy taste. Another unexpected favorite at the Franklin Inn is actually not a Mexican dish at all...but it is their hot wings. They are crispy, made on the grill, and super spicy! They only come one way,and they are perfect.

What is a Mexican Resturant without margaritas!? Well they are excellent here too! They come in a Mason jar and there are tons of favors to choose from including mango, strawberry, peach, and traditional. I recommend sharing a 32 oz, or drinking it all yourself if you don't mind stumbling on your way out. BUT before you do that, make sure you save room for some ice cream! It is homemade and they have awesome Mexican hot fudge ...just the right amount of spice to go with your chocolate.

One last favorite for this post is Cenci's in Wexford, not only do I know many people who work here, but I love the fact that they are open every day and serve food until 2am. This is perfect for when my husband gets off work at midnight and we still want to go out and grab something to eat. Cenci's has your typical Italian dishes, along with hoagies, pizza, and a variety of appetizers. They have the best Sicilian pizza, which can be ordered in a variety of sizes inducing a two cut, which is perfect for a midnight snack. They also make homemade ranch dressing which I dip everything in-it is really that good! In addition to the pizza the hot garlic wings, Roma puffs (fried pizza dough), house salads (which yes, I put ranch on!)and fried ravioli are some of my favorites. They also have craft beers on draft and by bottle, and six packs to go which makes this place perfect.

I hope that this post will inspire many of you to visit one of these local restaurants, or a local restaurant near you. This is only a start to my favorite local places, expect to see more in future posts. Enjoy!

The Book is ALWAYS Better

"Happy Hunger Games! May the odds ever be in your favor..."

My husband and I finally went and saw The Hunger Games movie, now I don't want to say it was a disappointment, because they did do a great job with many parts, but it just wasn't the book. If you did not read the book you would be lost in terms of many of the relationships between characters and overall character development was lacking. The biggest example being the relationship between Rue and Katniss. It was there and a very dramatic part of the movie (I am trying to avoid any big spoilers for those of you who have not yet read the book), however the connection between Rue and Prim was not made clear at all. Another disappointment, for me, was president Snow ...I am not sure what it was, but he was nothing like what I pictured, maybe I was thinking someone younger? I'm not sure.

The biggest plot difference was the role of Gamemaker. He had a very prominent role in the movie, that was not expressed in the book. I am going to assume this was done to further explain the games and how they are extremly controlled by the government. Along with the Gamemaker's role, Haymitch's relationship with the Gamemaker was very odd as well, and not all developed in the book as it was in the movie. (Again I apologize for the vague references...doing my best not to spoil the book or movie).

Enough with the negative, because I do have to give the movie some credit for some very positive aspects that were done very well; the actual games were depicted very well in the movie. The violence was very much brought to life and there were a few times I jumped out of my seat. The violence was done in such a way that it did not seem gruesome or over the top; the audience saw a good amount, but some was also left implied, which created a great balance. The way in which the Humger Games section was filmed made you feel as though you were experiencing the same feelings and events as Katniss, for example when she is hallucinating due to the Tracker Jackers you feel as though you are having the hallucination right there along with her. Overall, the movie does hone in on the emotions felt by Katniss throughout the story; and truly made you feel, at times, that you were her. -This, to me, was the best accomplishment of the movie.

Overall, am I glad I saw the movie? Yes. Does it make me as excited to see Catching Fire brought to life, as before? Sadly, no. I found the book far more developed (as it usually is) and just an overall a better indicator of the thoughts, feelings, and relationships between the characters. The hissing cat at the beginning, I clearly knew it to be Buttercup and laughed...didn't read the book? You would have no idea.

Putting it all in perspective

Lately, I have come to the realization that I work a ton. A normal work week for me has become 55 hours+ which isn't awful, but after a while it is super exhausting; however I am determined to keep a positive perspective and push through even in the toughest of weeks. This week started off with an awful case of the Mondays, I was 100% doubting that I wanted to be Beachbody coach, and just all around had a Monday day! The power of good, not good but great friends/co-workers pulled me right out of that rut, and made me realize that there is no need to stress out. Sometimes we all need to be reminded of our positive attributes, and not just the negatives.
I'm bringing that same no stress attitude into today, even though I woke up and thought it was Wednesday, only to quickly realize it was still only Tuesday. We have to make sure that we keep in mind the things we do well, and the things we don't we need to set goals for and improve. I love goal setting, but only since I've learned to make short term goals that are attainable. Once you continuously set and reach your goals, you will see your happiness and overall confidence increase. I want to push you all to set one goal that you can reach by May 1st. Mine is to lose 10 more pounds, I know I have eat well, push hard each day to work out and stay focused....it is a challenging goal, but attainable.
To wrap up the idea of putting it all in perspective make sure you are reaching out to those friends and family who make you feel the happiest, you know the ones who you know will put a smile on your face. Call them! - don't sit around waiting for the phone to ring make it happen. I know everyone gets busy, myself included, but it is important to reach out and surround yourself with those who support you and make you an all around better person.
Also don't forget to take a few moments for yourself each day, trust me it makes all the difference for your happiness. No one wants to feel like all they do is work, sleep, eat, and clean! Talk a walk, run, play catch with the dog, read, write, call a friend, watch an awful tv show (Jersey Shore or Dance Moms, anyone?), and just enjoy each day as much as you can! Oh, and one more thing, don't forget to let those you love know it!

A Little Late....

Hello all, I am a little late starting my blog, I was actually told to start blogging about 3 months ago when I started my first beachbody challenge with a high school friend of mine Megan - but better late than never right? I have started this amazing journey to get healthy and fit and focus on my nutrition and it has increased my overall happiness and internal motivation to do great things with my life. I am currently working out with two beachbody programs - Brazil Butt Lift (BBL) and Turbo Fire - they are both extremely challenging, but I love them! I am also drinking Shakeology which is an insanely good meal replacement. I used to dance in high school, but always had a problem controlling my eating and weight. After graduating college, getting engaged, and landing an awesome job (where I sit all day!) I let myself get up to over 180 pounds- which is so hard to admit. I am happy to say that I am already down to 165 because of beachbody and could not be happier! I really cannot explain how far I have come, and how motivated I am to continue this journey called life. I actually believe in beachbody so much, that I have decided to become a coach to try and help others on their personal goals as well. Please visit my site to learn how these amazing programs can help you succeed as well! (www.beachbodycoach.com/NICOLETANNER)

My husband and I also love to try new resturants in the Pittsburgh area, as well as other cities when we travel, I will do my best to include some resturant reviews about some of our personal favorites, as well as some recipes of my own- for those of you who know me, I love cooking and sharing my ideas. I am also an online high school English Teacher- so I am sure this blog will also have some book reviews, in addition to focusing on my journey to become the very best daughter, wife, aunt, cousin, grand-daughter, niece, and friend to all those important people in my life. - So stay tuned I am sure it will be an enjoyable ride!